The Body Grief Journal

As a disabled queer person, Pride Month brings up a mix of emotions. On one hand, it's a time to celebrate our identities, our histories,...

Tears streamed down my cheeks as I allowed myself a moment to sink into the weight of it all. One would think receiving 'good news' from the doctor wouldn't leave you reeling, but here I am, spinning. "Negative Margins" they said, and just another biopsy in six months. More of this dreaded 'Wait and see' game. Back in 2005, I underwent a LEEP procedure for CIN 2, followed by years of chasing abnormal paps. And now, this latest test reveals Adenocarcinoma in situ and CIN 2. Th

I am utterly exhausted, recovering from my first surgery. I don't typically subscribe to the stages of grief, but if I were to label what I'm experiencing, it's somewhere between bargaining and feelings of surrender. I acknowledge that these emotions might shift in an instant when the pathology report arrives. I'm wishing for the best outcome - clear margins and 'only' a radical hysterectomy. It's a peculiar journey, laden with tears and the weight of uncertainty, pain, and f