What Actually Keeps Us Alive
Updated: Oct 11
As Suicide Prevention Month approaches, I’m filled with frustration and sorrow. It’s disheartening to see mainstream calls for forced treatment and other harmful approaches that feel so disconnected from my own experiences and those of others who live with suicidality daily. For many of us who have been labeled with psychiatric diagnoses, survived psychiatric systems, or navigate suicidality as part of our everyday lives, this month can be particularly challenging. The dominant narratives around suicide “prevention” often emphasize carceral approaches that do more harm than good, especially for those of us who have experienced the violence of psychiatric incarceration.
I want to share my personal experiences with what has supported me in moments when I wanted to die, as well as what has exacerbated my pain. These reflections are not universal truths, but they are my lived experiences. I hope they resonate with others who may feel unseen or unheard in mainstream discussions of suicide “prevention.”
What Suicide Prevention Has Been for Me:
Having a support system
Friends and family who didn’t give up on me
A therapist who saw me as more than my diagnosis
Access to health insurance
Respectful medical providers
Alt2Su groups and other non-carceral support spaces
Access to LGBTQIA2S+ spaces
Peer support
Autonomy in therapeutic spaces
Being believed
Being heard
My pets
Leaving an abusive relationship and accessing safe, affordable housing
Working from home
Flexible work schedule
Having enough food
Being able to pay my bills
Getting out of debt
Having a caring partner
What Did Not Help and Caused More Harm:
Forced treatment and involuntary commitment
Being restrained, held down, and drugged against my will
Harmful labels and stigmatizing terms
Not being believed because of my labels
Being overmedicated
No informed consent around medications
No support coming off medications
Medical gaslighting
Being uninsured
Being given a list of resources without actual support
Hotline numbers instead of real support
Witnessing harm in treatment settings
Living in a place where it felt unsafe to be queer
Harmful legislation
Capitalism
Harmful and toxic workplaces
Poverty
Debt collectors
Ableism and sanism
As we enter Suicide “Prevention” Month, I want to see the conversation move away from punitive and coercive measures and toward genuine care and support. Suicidality itself is not the crisis. The crisis is in the ways people are met with control, superiority, and dominance when they reach out for help. The deeper crisis is systemic, rooted in capitalism, colonialism, and oppression.
Real prevention is not about policing or managing people. It is about building a world where everyone has access to resources, respect, and community. It means listening to people about what they need rather than assuming we know what is best for them.
May we listen more, believe more, and care more without judgment or force.
